SS1's week trip was midway through SS2's 6 week trip. Shortly after we picked SS1 up from the airport, DH and SS1 took a road trip to visit DH's parents. DH called me from the road - he'd about had it. SS1 had spent 4 hours complaining about his trip. It would take hours to type up all of it, and almost all of it we can't do anything about anyway. However...
...DH starts asking me about whip-its. I'm like, what? He had no idea either, he just said SS1 was pissed about it. So on the internet I go. Ready for this?
Whip-its: using a whipped cream can to suck out the gas which dispenses the whipped cream to get high. In other words, HUFFING. We'd talked to the boys about huffing in the past, but in relation to chemicals like cleaning products or stuff you would find in a garage. But we hadn't even heard of using whipped cream containers.
When DH and SS1 got back from their trip a couple weeks later, we talked to SS1 about it some more. Apparently, SS1 asked BM why there were 8 empty whipped cream containers in her fridge. She then proceeds to tell the boys how cool it is, shows them how to do it, and tells them that her and Perpetual Fiance do it often. Then she tells them to try it. WTF?
As if that wasn't enough, she bought SS1 a pack of cigarettes!
After the shock of it all wore off, DH and I got some advice from several sources. We talked to a couple close friends - same reaction as ours. We talked to our local police chief, who had gotten to know SS1 very well right after his friend's suicide. He offered to come over to the house with the DARE officer to discuss the dangers with the boys, which they followed through on. Did you know you can die instantly from huffing? Of course, MOTY told the boys it was safe because it is the same gas they use at the dentist. Ummmm, I'm pretty sure dentists are licensed to administer that drug. I also posted on a message board I regularly frequent, and the responses were quite in line with what we were planning. After SS2 arrived home, we contacted CPS. Both boys told the investigator what had happened, and we stressed to the boys this was not about getting their mom in trouble, but protecting their sister. If SS1 was there a week and witnessed the huffing, imagine how often their sister sees it happening! She's 8. Even SS2 at 14 didn't realize how serious this is. DH and I would feel awful if we knew that was going on there and something tragic happened. Because we are in different states, the investigation is still ongoing, and of course the Friday before the Monday we talked to the investigator BM left a message on DH's phone saying they are moving back to FormerHomeState, and then moving to one of two other states. So she's on the move, and it may take a while for CPS to catch up to her.
She has not yet given us her new address, so the boys will not be making any trips anytime soon. We're sure she is expecting them at Christmas, but if the case is still open when it is time to make the travel arrangements (early November), we will be doing what we need to do in court to make sure they do not go. Our lawyer finds it very unlikely that the Marital Master would force a trip with an open case with CPS regarding drug use, especially since it is against our court order. Huffing is also against the law in BM's state where this happened, a misdemeanor to do it, a felony to supply chemicals to another to do it. She did both. If there is a CPS finding, criminal charges may follow shortly.
Or, things could go as they usually do when dealing with a PEW, everyone looks the other way...
Who We Are
- dragonmctt, stepmom
- dh, custodial father
- ss1, 19 yrs old
- ss2, 16 yrs old
September 30, 2009
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1 comment:
that is crazy...teaching your own kid to huff..I don't know how a judge could let them around her after this! I hope CPS catches up with her soon for those kids sakes
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