My daddy needs to talk to you...

Alrighty then, today we had our pretrial hearing. Before I go into the comical events of the day, I'll update you on the GAL's report.

GAL Report:

The GAL's report was short and sweet, as he mostly addressed only the visitation issues. SS1 wants Christmas and only two weeks in the summer at BM's. SS2 wants Christmas, April vacation and all of summer. Ironically, about 1 1/2 weeks before we get the GAL report, SS2 informs us that he wants to play golf next year (his freshman year in high school). Guess what? Practice starts two weeks before school starts. When we got the GAL report we explained to him that he already had his opportunity to let the GAL know what he wanted and he apparently did not make it clear enough, so it was up to him to get his mother to agree, and that we would not be making any efforts with BM to make that happen for him.

Regarding our petition for sole decision-making based on the medical issues of last summer, the GAL merely recommended that any medical issues be addressed with the boys' primary care physician. This is a step in the right direction, but we are going to ask that the order specifically states that BM needs to notify DH in advance, as it should not be up to the physician to do BM's parenting for her.

Pre-Trial hearing:

So we get to the courthouse and are in the waiting room with the GAL and our attorney. The family court is in the process of moving, so we were kind of curious how this was all going to pan out since they had already removed the phones to the new building (BM always appears via telephone because of her "illnesses". The lucky body part of the day today was her pancreas - new one, she hadn't gone there yet!) Lo and behold, someone from the Superior Court stopped by our table and let our attorney know she was on the phone. But when our attorney got there, it was actually her FATHER! He went on this tirade about how messed up the family court was. Our attorney came back chuckling and told us what happened. About 10 minutes later, another woman from the Superior Court office came over and said BM was now on the phone. Attorney goes to talk to her and record her pretrial statement. No official hearing - never even saw the marital master.

What happens now, you ask?

BM told attorney that she was done, ready to settle. She stated that SS2 will be coming to see her in April. What she doesn't realize is that the April vacation was only recommended by the GAL - it is not officially ordered. So if she doesn't settle by the end of this week, it is highly unlikely that SS2 will be coming out for April.

While we were sitting with the GAL and our attorney, the GAL suggested the same thing we suggested to BM back in January, which was that each of the boys meet with a third party (we had suggested their counselor, but our GAL volunteered to be the third party today) to express their wishes for each vacation time, the GAL would determine the dates, ask BM if she wanted the kids on those dates - yes or no, the flights would be made, and there would be no changes. DH and I are all on board with that! We have no problem with the GAL getting a first hand experience trying to make arrangements with BM.

So, she either agrees with this new old plan ASAP, or we go to final hearing, which would be set for about 30 days from now, well after April vacation.



I can't believe she had her father call the courthouse! Makes us think she may be back living with her parents in FormerHomeState, though. It seems unusual that he would call unless she was right in front of him pitching a fit. We'll find out if she doesn't pick up the paperwork at the current address she has on file with the court! When we were leaving, we apologized to our attorney for having to listen to the BS from BM's father, and let him know, unfortunately, BM's dad is the mellow one! Attorney shook his head, rolled his eyes and laughed.

He really has no idea!

GAL Update 3

Yesterday the GAL Board faxed a letter to our lawyer stating the the GAL assigned to us is NOT certified.

Today in the mail we got the Motion to Dismiss the GAL (included was the letter from the GAL Board). So now we wait to see what the judge orders.

Interestingly, our lawyer spoke to our GAL 11/24 regarding our concerns. Then on 11/25 she proceeds to send us the questionnaire. I'm sure she will try to deduct some money from what she has to refund us for all that "work" she did already. I also find it strange that her letter accompanying the questionnaire is addressed 11/25, yet the postmark is 12/3 and we just got it today.

GAL Update 2 - WTF????

Unbelievable!

Before DH's case was assigned a GAL, I downloaded the list of state certified GAL's. Our GAL was not on the list. So, I figured she was just a new GAL and the state had not updated it's PDF file in a while. Called the GAL board of the state, and what do you know, not only is our GAL NOT certified, she has also had a complaint filed against her from another county. Of course the board cannot do anything about the complaint, because she is not certified and not under their jurisdiction.

My first thought is to the $500 we just sent this woman. Called bank, check had not cleared yet, but did not stop payment, because I wanted to get my facts straight first and not piss off our potential GAL.

So, I call the county that filed the complaint and talked to the clerk. She confirmed that a complaint was filed, but could not discuss because the case was confidential.

So, I call our clerk to find out if the county was in fact required to use certified only GAL's and if there was some type of "grandfathering" rule that had been applied to her. Of course our clerk was in court. By the time I got a hold of her around 3, the check had been cashed : ( The clerk stated that this GAL, as well as several others, are under review, to be held on Dec 15th, as the clerks office had as well become aware that there were certification issues, however the Marital Master had said to go ahead and use her anyway. I gave her the info for the other county clerk for her to call and see if she could get more info than I could. She suggested that since we knew all this information, we should go ahead and file a motion for a new GAL.

So, on the phone with our attorney. He is going to confirm all these facts on Wednesday, when the GAL board opens back up, and then file a motion to assign a new GAL. He is also going to ask that our current GAL be responsible for forwarding the funds to the new GAL. He called the GAL to discuss this with her and she just left us a phone message stating that there must be some confusion because of using her former married name, that she has been certified since 1995, and that she is unaware of any complaints.

She is another BM! Take any shred of factual information and twist it until you can no longer recognize it. First of all, the board has only been around since 2007, so how she could be certified with the board since 1995 is beyond me. Neither of her "names", married or otherwise, are on the list. And she is totally denying the complaint exists.

We are not calling her back until we hear from our attorney on Wednesday to see what he makes of the whole situation.

Of course, we have put ourselves in a precarious position, GOD forbid, the MM says we have to use her and we've started off on a very bad foot. But, I can't imagine with everything we know about her the MM is going to keep her on our case and risk us pursuing this further. This woman needs to be off our case - and I can't believe that we are the ones putting two and two together for everyone. Ughhhhhhh!

GAL Update 1

We made contact with the GAL. After she receives our check, she is sending us the paperwork we need to fill out for her to begin the investigation. I'll let you know what that's like...