Such is the way of the world
You can never know
Just where to put all your faith
And How will it grow?
Gonna rise up
Burning black holes in dark memories
Gonna rise up
Turning mistakes into gold
Such is the passage of time
Too fast to fold
Suddenly swallowed by signs
Lo and behold
Gonna rise up
Find my direction magnetically
Gonna rise up
Throw down my Ace in the Hole
-Eddie Vedder, Into the Wild
Really needing this song today...not sure how I'm going to make it to the 20th. The anxiety of what could happen is overwhelming.
Showing posts with label What was I thinking?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label What was I thinking?. Show all posts
August 14, 2008
March 25, 2008
Summer 2000, Part 2
During the summer of 2000, I was still in a delusional fog. DH and I had moved in together before the boys came for visitation, and had about 3 months of bliss. We ate out when we wanted, slept in when we wanted, and basically were only apart for work. We went to concerts, spent time with friends and family, took day trips.
When we got back from vacation in my home state, I treated the boys as I had the children I had nannied over the years, with affection and support, but not as a parental figure.
Oh, so naively, I thought I could befriend BM. After all, she had been unfaithful in their marriage, she had wanted the separation, she had moved away, she had a Perpetual Fiance (and later we would find out, a new baby on the way). Surely, she had moved on. Apparently she just wasn't over the Boyd's Bears yet!
After a couple weeks of hammering things out, she and I were able to negotiate terms for the divorce (at this point, DH and her could not carry on a civil conversation for a minute!) DH would pay back taxes, child support and medical insurance, she would maintain custody with DH having summer visitation and alternating Winter vacation. Papers drawn up by worthless lawyer #1. Papers served. All goes to pot over some stupid Boyd's Bears figurines that she thought DH had taken, and she insisted that she didn't have them and she wanted them back or she wasn't signing anything. (She probably found them later when she unpacked her storage unit!) They must have been very sentimental, since they cost her custody of her children.
When we got back from vacation in my home state, I treated the boys as I had the children I had nannied over the years, with affection and support, but not as a parental figure.
Oh, so naively, I thought I could befriend BM. After all, she had been unfaithful in their marriage, she had wanted the separation, she had moved away, she had a Perpetual Fiance (and later we would find out, a new baby on the way). Surely, she had moved on. Apparently she just wasn't over the Boyd's Bears yet!
After a couple weeks of hammering things out, she and I were able to negotiate terms for the divorce (at this point, DH and her could not carry on a civil conversation for a minute!) DH would pay back taxes, child support and medical insurance, she would maintain custody with DH having summer visitation and alternating Winter vacation. Papers drawn up by worthless lawyer #1. Papers served. All goes to pot over some stupid Boyd's Bears figurines that she thought DH had taken, and she insisted that she didn't have them and she wanted them back or she wasn't signing anything. (She probably found them later when she unpacked her storage unit!) They must have been very sentimental, since they cost her custody of her children.
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